Travis Bridges

That morning,
I had a dream about my late wife/my sons mother. Although I thought of her often, it’s been years since I’ve seen her in my dreams.
For a few moments, I experienced what it felt like being “young and in love.”
We were laughing, talking, holding hands and having fun like old times. It was obvious that we had been apart and in my mind, I was thinking, “I’m Never letting you go!”
When I woke up, I immediately thought she was someone else but within seconds, I realized it was her and emotionally, I began to reach as I realized it was a dream, she faded away.
I was very sad and for a few minutes, I had a rough time dealing with that loss all over again. I realized that That feeling, is what has been missing for so long.
Remarrying, singleness and even dating to name a few has all played their roles and the fulfillment of experiencing That type of love and acceptance from a physical perspective is indeed a Void. Not that I’ve not had people in my life, just not the sincere fulfillment that only a true soul-mate generates.
Of course my personal relationship with my inner soul is in tact. I’ve even come to Really know and accept myself more in dept.
I spent many days writing and including this experience in my notes to hopefully better understand in time but that morning marks a drastic change in my outlook on how I see what I think I want, and know is Very important.
It’s one thing to date, have a significant other, be in a relationship, seeing someone or just digging the scenes but it’s a totally different experience to know, have or have had the experience of being wanted, honored, accepted, appreciated, respected and unconditionally loved to the point that there is No reason to doubt or be afraid.
Sometimes we search to find and fill voids but when we find or reach an “Understanding”, the search is over.
~T. Bridges, 2020/(14)
#growing, #maturity, #experience #understanding…
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